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Tuesday, May 6, 2008

For the ladies...

The dishes are mostly clean...

The carpet is mostly vacuumed...

The laundry is mostly put away...

The beds are mostly made...

You're welcome.

 

What? You mean that didn't do it for you? What the hell? I've been getting all of my "how to get the wife hot" advice from studies and humour books.

What's that? I have to finish all of those chores?

Dammit.

19 comments:

Lipstick Jungle said...

I just looked in my kitchen, and the dishes are piled high. The vacuum is still buried under the dirty laundry, and the bed, well, there is something in it making scary noises, so nope, Im stayin away!

Popped over from fadkog. Love your comments. You crack me. And of course got sucked in my the "You.." cant remember what all it said, on your blog log. So now I have one too. I am such a follower!

Love the pics of you and your daughter. You would make alot of men envious of the relationship you two have!

Anonymous said...

Actually having them "mostly" done totally does it for me. It means there's at least significantly less for me to do.

Now get on with making the yumm-o desserts that I've been posting.

Backpacking Dad said...

justlori2day: You're gonna have to give me more to go on than "You..." It says that somewhere on my blog log? :}

madwomanmeg: It just means that I have (1) more things to do or (2) possibly guilty feelings to feel or (3) to move.

Alison said...

You'd have my vote.... any attempt is appreciated!

Jo said...

Hey - that's better than the housework in my flat. The vacuum hasn't seen light of day for months, the washing up gets done when the plates crawl into the sink and wash themselves, and the laundry gets washed when we run out of underwear.
I'm impressed with you! :-)

Badass Geek said...

You know.... To completion, I do the dishes and laundry, vacuum and sweep, cook dinner and clean up afterwards.

All that work yields a "Thank You", but it has yet to bring about an increase in extracurricular activities.

for a different kind of girl said...

Awww yeah, it's business time!

Except before that happens, the lady of the manor has to dive into hour four of the seven extra hours of housework a man creates, then toss in a load of clothes, fill out some consent forms (not for the business time, but I suppose there's always that possibility...)...

Patti said...

I'd settle for the clothes being partially put away any day. Especially since I wash for six people, then fold and sort.

I do have to say that Mr. Mayo runs the vacuum cleaner more than I do but knows not to touch the dishwasher because I'm OCD about how it it should be loaded.

As for the bed, I get up earlier than he does so he should make it.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

I think if you want the act completed you've got to complete the act first!

Danielle said...

eh, what's your definition of mostly?

:)

Great job!

Heather said...

Shoot, I'd for sure increase on the extracurricular activities if somebody was doing all my housework. Hell, I'd increase them anyway without all that if my husband gave me the chance. =(

Anonymous said...

Okay, I would be totally happy about the chores being MOSTLY done. Way to go!!! But could you add?: cooking most of the dinner, cleaning most of the toddler.....

Miss Notesy said...

I think "mostly" would totally do it for me too. If I've had a little too much to drink on top of that, well, then things get really fun.

DeeDee said...

Let's just hope the Mrs. doesn't want you pay you back with a "mostly" in the bedroom!! Now get your ass in there and finish the laundry!!

Swanny said...

And what kind of thanks do we get for being "mostly" sober, "mostly" showered, or "mostly" paying attention to whatever she's saying?

They gotta give something, right? I mean, at least we're trying.

Backpacking Dad said...

fire fox: sweet!

jo: I'm impressed your plates are mobile.

badass geek: hmmm. you're probably doing it too well (as most of us do). You have to artfully neglect one or two little tiny things that can be noticed so that she says to herself "wow, he did all of this work today". If you're too good at it nothing gets noticed. :}

FADKOG: I've had the "it's business time" song from the Conchords in my head for a few days now.

patti_mayo: I'm OCD about the dishwasher loading too. Dirty dishes ONLY!

jenn: I think you might be on to something...

Danielle: um. there are more than 3 shirts that haven't been put away...more than 20 sq feet that haven't been vacuumed...a load of clean dishes in the dishwasher, although some dirty ones are in the sink...there are slightly wrinkled sheets and comforters on the beds....

heather: ah, that's the thing, though, isn't it. It's all my housework...I just like to find other things to do instead of finishing it off.

danielle-lee: I would have, except that dinner and bedtime were over when I was writing. Dinner was all me, as it always is (except when I say "screw it all, we're going to Chili's!"

lani: that's what I forgot! the hooch!

deedee: when you're right, you're right.

swanny: that's just inspired.

Aunt Becky said...

Dude, at this point I'd take that. Happily, even.

Tootsie Farklepants said...

Yes. And you have to mostly finish foreplay too.

Kat said...

Yes, you have to finish them. And then you have to NOT throw the toddler at me the very moment I walk in the door (ok, he doesn't usually do this). And let me take a bubble bath for an hour or so once a week at least.