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Friday, January 9, 2009

Saber

Have I ever told you about the old cavalry saber my father had hanging in the living room?

I invaded two countries with that sword.

After my parents separated and my father left, my mother and sister and I moved off the rez into the the smelly little industrial town across the river. I was thirteen and I stopped cutting my hair and I skateboarded and I smoked and I had an earring and I wore a jean jacket with buttons on it that said stupid things. I still had the cavalry saber. It was a token, protection, symbolic. It was my father's. It was mine.

One night I drew the saber and walked into the living room of our basement apartment. The tip of the blade went against the throat of the sleeping sack of shit on the couch, the drunk piece of white trash who had somehow entered our lives.

I stood there over his body and faced my eternities. Some choices are weightless. Other choices are endless.

"You breathe now because I permit it." And I went back to my room.

19 comments:

cat said...

Uhm.. wow. Well said.

Kyddryn said...

Not that I have a vested interest in your personal evolution or anything, but...I AM glad you made that choice.

And I hate that you had to.

Shade and Sweetwater,
K

ChurchPunkMom said...

agreeing with Kyddryn.. glad, and grateful.

i'm not surprised though.. because you ARE the better man. ;)

Mommy Melee said...

Jeez dude. That's intense.

Maura said...

I have to second everything that was said above. And add an extra Wow.

heather said...

Guts & Instincts. You got 'em.

Kat said...

As I said via Twitter, that is deep. For a young boy to have to make that type of decision and make the correct one, amazing. I am so glad that you did what you did, but didn't do what you really wanted to do. It shows that you had good character even at a young age.

Miss Grace said...

Way to be the better human.

'Nette said...

And another Wow. I'm speechless. And I hope I never put my son in that situation.

Heather said...

Good choice.

James Austin said...

That took balls. Well done.

Kimberly said...

And you'll remember that moment forever. Glad you chose to let the fucker breathe even if he didn't deserve to.

bejewell said...

Jeez. Remind me never to crash on your chouch.

bejewell said...

And by "chouch" I mean "couch." Obviously. Don't knife me.

Danielle said...

Wow.

ballsy. brave.

good choice.

did you wear Doc Martins too? just curious.

1sttimedad said...

I wonder if he ever knew how close he came ...

Astrogirl426 said...

Your stories - both the stories of your childhood and the stories of you now, as a dad - make me want to be a better parent every day.

Thank you for sharing.

My_Dog_Is_Better said...

Mom and I were just laughing about that story a few weeks ago. You were so badass...Did she mention it, or is it coincidence that you wrote about it now?

Don Mills Diva said...

Wow and wow.

I'm going to need some more details to flush out my rich fantasy life please.